Fruitful Friday

This is what I woke up to this morning admittedly the light in the room and flash make it look slightly darker than it was but then again you can’t hear the thunder or see the lightning that accompanied the rain either.  Yet despite the drumming of rain on the windows I am quite cheerful today.  By the time I close my eyes tonight the first draft of the novel will be completed.  I am a third of the way through writing the final chapter and broke off to blog. Strange you may think, why not stick at it stay with the flow.  Well to be honest it is actually a little emotional to write.  I finished the penultimate chapter last night with tears streaming down my face.  Now I know I cry easily I admit it but I have known since the beginning how things would end yet I still find it emotional writing it.  Panicking to check if it really was that heart breaking or I am just too soft I got a friend to read it turns out it is a good job she loves me because she ended up crying too and she doesn’t like crying at books, sorry hun.  I have a feeling there will be more tears before the end of this chapter but because it involves different viewpoints and tying up loose ends I am trying to stay rational to make sure I get everything in.

Then that terrible four letter process begins the EDIT.  I have three weeks to get the edit done for the award submission deadline which basically equates to one or two chapters per day to be edited.  Why do I do this to my self?  Then it clicked I do actually work better under pressure.  I dragged out writing the novel a few hundred words at a time when I was in the mood for months yet in the time since I realised the deadline was looming I have done more than over the past few months.  Has the quality suffered?  My read-along friends tell me the opposite.  when I think about university I always did quite well in exams despite the fact I turned into a quivering wreck the night before.   The best essays were they ones I left until ridiculously close to the deadline and had to work at through the early hours.  We all work in different ways and I am beginning to realise that I need to set myself targets and goals.  I joined the post a day scheme when I first joined wordpress but didn’t really worry too much if I missed the odd day but now having stuck this blog out there for Kindle I feel I have to not only produce the promised post a day but produce something to justify those who follow me taking the time to read it.

Now do not think for one minute that that means those who have been here from the start mean any less because you don’t you are the ones who have inspired me and motivated me more than you will ever know.  It is you who by returning time and time again have given me the belief that possibly someone out there might think this blog worthy of those 99 cents kindle charge.

Today is a good day, today I have belief in my ability to do this. Tomorrow I may well be a jibbering wreck again and lose all self belief but for today I shall bask in this warm fuzzy feeling while it lasts and say thankyou all for jumping on board and sharing the rollercoaster ride that writing is.  And now I shall swagger forth ‘once more int the breach dear friends’ and return you to your scheduled programming while I write.

I shall also be watching Wimbledon and trying not to get to excited at having a Brit in the semi finals, to get excited will only fuel disappointment if he remembers he is British and messes up.