I am not sure what prompted me to do this one and I am going to be honest I did not play it back until after I posted it otherwise I might not have done it. I hope that parts of it do not come across as self pitying I didn’t mean it to I just wanted to talk openly about some feelings I have been going through recently.
Vlog Time #22 – Heart to Heart Chat Time
Paula Acton 
Reblogged this on William Chasterson.
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This was a very open Vlog. I’m glad because it gives me chance to tell you that not everyone expects the smile all the time.It’s OK to show pain because we all suffer some and you have enough friends willing to rally round any time ;life has not been at it’s best.
I felt for you during your break up and when your Nan died. Those were very rough times. But it was hard to gauge how bad when you were trying to pretend all was OK. Sweetie this is your vlog and blog and you can be just as human as you like. Just remember that many of your readers are also your friends so we can be leant upon when needed.
xxx Huge Hugs xxx
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I think the thing is when you have to be strong for the kids you end up making everyone else think you are okay and it get harder to say actually no I’m not. I will get there, I am thinking maybe I should do a vlog like this maybe once a month just to update on the healing process Huge hugs as always xxxx
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Dear Paula – you may be in turmoil inside, but I know YOU ARE a strong, loving and extremely smart woman who is empowered by the good and the bad things that happen in your life. I have struggled so much with over-eating disorders and body image. We are very kindred spirits in that respect. But let’s face it, we are beautiful… just they way we are! I don’t care about scales, mirrors, measuring tapes, sizes. All I care about is the person we are underneath. You radiate goodness and honesty. You are appreciated by those around you. I am your biggest fan, not because of anything but how you have overcome the most tragic circumstances and still LIVE!!! Remember that… Lots of love, Emily
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I guess it is the fact my size and health are holding me back from doing things I really want to do that really bothers me rather than what anyone else thinks looking at me, but I will get there, you inspire me and you know I think the world of you and your friendship 😀
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Great post, and yes, it’s good to get your feelings out sometimes. Though, I’m not quite sure what a stone translates to here unless I google it (sorry lol). I hate dieting too, it always makes me unhappy. I guess you feel better about yourself when you’re skinnier, but damn you miss that little ice cream cone/piece of cheesecake every now and then. If it makes you feel better, I gained over ten pounds in a month last time I checked. I don’t really want to be in pictures from the boobs down anymore because I’m huge lol. And I’m glad you’re trying to get healthier, so good for you. Maybe lots more walks with the monster? I bet he walks at a running pace, so it’s like going for a jog. Plus, the scenery is great 😉 Take care, Paula ❤
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Hmmm think you have a damn good reason for going a few pounds xxx
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True, lol, hopefully I lose most of it at the end of the summer 😉
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I am sure chasing Kyle while carrying a baby will see you back in shape in no time 😀
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Thank you for sharing. It’s a beautiful and brave thing to do.
All the best, and a big virtual hug.
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Thank you x
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