It was still dark when I awoke. It took a few minutes for me to get my bearings and remember where I was. I lay in the dark contemplating what had happened. He was angry and bitter and that was obviously the cause of him acting like an arse. No doubt he expected to go creeping along the corridor to our room. Expected me to slid into bed next to him grovelling and apologetic, well bollocks to him. He would have a long wait.
I realised I was starving I hadn’t eaten when I got in due to his little drama queen performance. I got up and felt my way to the wall and groped my way to the light switch. Damn! Just as the light came on my foot descended on the open lotion. A thick glob of cream shot from the bottle landing in the middle of a new trouser suit I had bought for a meeting at work on monday. Cursing I scooped it up along with a few other items soiled by the errant cream.
I set off towards the kitchen planning in my head that if I put them in the washer now and turned it on as soon as it reached a reasonible hour I would still have time to dry and press the suit and wear it still. I was about three feet from the washer when he spoke. “You are on my side of the room” I stopped he was sat in the corner of the room he had been hidden by the door as I entered. “are you really going to keep this up?” “If you don’t like it you can leave.” “Whatever!” I turned and looked at the floor then stepped back across the line dropping my clothes in a pile. For the first time now I took stock of his division of our space. The table sat directly across the central line one chair on my side one on his. His side also contained the fridge, washing machine, dishwasher and cooker. I had been left with the freezer, most of the cupboards, the microwave and the sink. My head now started pounding, I reached into my handbag which still lay where I hand put it on the table and pulled out some painkillers. I opened the cupboard to reach for a glass to get some water, nothing. The cupboard was bare. I opened the next again empty. Then I noticed the stack of boxes piled in the corner, the idiot had actually gone to the trouble of removing every single cup, glass and plate from the cupboards and piled them up in the boxes. I leaned over the sink and stuck my head under the tap slurping at the running water. I stood at the sink looking out the window when a realisation struck me. The food he had cooked when I got home I could hear him laughing as I walked to look at the contents of the freezer. Empty the stupid git must have spent the whole day while I was at work cooking everything he could. I turned and looked at him as he stood by the fridge and slowly opened the door to reveal overstuffed shelves.
“Okay you want to play it that way, fine! But let me tell you, you are way out of your league!” I turned and headed to the dining room. Sitting at the dining room table I began to formulate my revenge on him. I would teach him. Who the hell did he think he was? So things hadn’t been going his way that was no excuse for this crap. I would make him coming begging on his knees.
As soon as the shop opened I went round there for supplies. Paper plates, plastic cups and cutlery, plenty of pop, biscuits, arms full of snacks and crap that didn’t require his precious fridge. Next stop was the laundrette, I dropped off the suit and a bag full of other stuff I could collect it in the morning on my way to work and change there. I was by now feeling rather proud of myself that despite all his plans I had not turned into the begging wreck he obviously expected me to.
Now for the next stage, I had always hated the dining room. He had decorated it before I moved in, it was the one room I had not got round to transforming now I attacked the wallpaper with relish. A sense of satisfaction permeated my soul as I ripped strip after strip from the wall. Now there would be no choice but to redecorate, I had already seen the colour scheme I wanted he had dismissed it as garish but if he kept up this stupid game he would have no say it would be done before I even contemplated breaking down.
It was now mid afternoon and I was hot and sweaty from my exertions. As I walked past him in the hallway towards the bathroom noticed he was looking at me as if he were trying to solve a complicated maths problem. I could literally hear the cogs turning. As I slid into the warm water I considered my next move. There was no way I was going to roll over and beg. He would be the one to come crawling and i would make damn sure he did. As I came out of the bathroom to make my way back to the bedroom he was there again stood in the hallway watching. I pulled the towel tighter as I passed him and shut the door behind me. That would be his down fall the one thing he could never turn down, my body. I rooted amongst my belonging until I found what I was looking for. I sat on the edge of the bed and applied my make up first, as I looked in the mirror I realised that for this to work it needed more and reached to the bottom of the make up bag and retrived the bright red lipstick I had worn for a fancy dress party when I had dressed as a Spanish Flamenco dancer. I ran my tongue over my lips pleased with the results. Ten minutes later I examined my appearance in the mirror. I let out a groan as I took in the outfit. He had bought me it for christmas. I remembered the effort it had taken to smile as I lifted it from its box. The red basque with black lace and piping was a perfect fit I had to give him credit for that but that was where it ended that he ever thought this was the type of thing I would choose it showed how little he paid attention. It would be ironic if his own present was his achilles heel. I adjusted the black fishnet stockings and slipped my feet into my black stilettos.
I peeked into the hallway. He was no longer there. I drew myself up to full height then sashayed down to the kitchen. He was at at the table when I entered I ignored the spluttering as he choked on his food. Moving over the the freezer I made to grab something from the carriers I had dumped there when I returned from my mornings excursion. I accidentally on purpose knocked the contents over so the spilled across the floor. Carefully positioning myself for maximum effect I bent at the waist taking my time to gather them together. I could hear him shuffling in his seat I smiled as I turned slightly so my ass was aimed directly at him. The next thing I heard was the sound of footsteps as he ran up the stairs. I stood up quickly banging my head against the side of the freezer as I did. Furious did not even come close to how I felt. I stood dressed like a cheap hooker as I heard him move around above my head. Then I heard the shower running. So I had been right about his weakness I had just failed to realise he had an escape route.
The sound of the running water echoed through my head then I realised he had the washer running aswell his favourite football shirt sloshing around in the soapy water. Water I hated that word. Then inspiration. The sink. I had the sink on my side. I opened the door and sank to my knees, I pulled the cleaning products out of the way. There it was an ally against his madness. I grabbed hold of the stopcock with both hands and twisted. Tighter and tighter. I heard cursing from above as his shower slowed to a dribble then stopped. I looked across at the washing machine smugly, knowing that the rinse cycle would never complete hoping that the machine would stop itself unable to fill and his precious shirt would be trapped in there until it rotted. Satisfied he would realise he had met his match I decide to turn in confident by the time I got home from work tomorrow he would have seen sense and the tape across kitchen would be gone. As I passed our bedroom door I looked in it was open only a few inches but I could see him reflected in the mirror trying to rub the shampoo out of his hair with a towel.